맨해튼의 된장녀와 된장남(?)

미국에는 Craigslist라는 우리나라로 치면 '벼룩시장'같은 사이트가 있습니다.  이 사이트의 '애인구함' 섹션에 재미난 글들이 자주 올라오는 편인데, 골때리는 걸 하나 발견해서 올립니다.

맨해튼에 사는 자칭 엄청난 미모의 된장녀가 연소득 50만불 이상의 고소득 결혼상대자를 찾는 글입니다.

What am I doing wrong?
Okay, I'm tired of beating around the bush. I'm a beautiful (spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I'm articulate and classy. I'm not from New York . I'm looking to get married to a guy who makes at least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don't think I'm overreaching at all.

Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around 200 - 250. But that's where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won't get me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she's not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I get to her level?

Here are my questions specifically:

- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars, restaurants, gyms

- What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won't hurt my feelings

- Is there an age range I should be targeting (I'm 25)?

- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east side so plain? I've seen really 'plain jane' boring types who have nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I've seen drop dead gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What's the story there?

- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?

- How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for MARRIAGE ONLY

Please hold your insults - I'm putting myself out there in an honest way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I'm being up front about it. I wouldn't be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn't able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a nice home and hearth.

자기보다 못생긴 여자가 돈잘버는 investment banker와 결혼해서 Tribeca라는 좋은 동네에 사는데, 자기도 그러지 못하리라는 법은 없다며 돈잘버는 남자를 만나서 결혼할 수 있는 비결을 묻습니다. 

(...)

이 글에 대해 자칭 연 50만불 이상 버는 남자가 답변을 달아놨는데 걸작입니다.

I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament. Firstly, I'm not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here's how I see it.
Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a crappy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity...in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won't be getting any more beautiful!

So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn't make good business sense to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease. In case you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It's as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.

Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So, I wonder why a girl as "articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful" as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K hasn't found you, if not only for a tryout.

By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation.

With all that said, I must say you're going about it the right way. Classic "pump and dump."

I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of lease, let me know.

자신과 같은 남자들이 원글여성같은 예쁜 여성과 결혼하는 것은 바보같은 짓이라는 겁니다.  왜냐하면, 자신의 소득은 시간이 지남에 따라 계속 증가할 가능성이 높지만(자칭 earning asset), 여성의 미모는 시간이 지남에 따라 퇴색되기 때문(depreciating asset)이라는 것이지요.  따라서 자신의 입장에서 그런 asset을 인수(결혼)하는 것은 멍청한 짓이고 차라리 일정기간동안 리스(데이트)하는 것이 당연한 선택이라고 합니다.  그리고 원글여성이 스스로 주장하는대로 그렇게 미모가 출중하다면 돈많은 남자들이 가만 놔뒀을리가 있느냐는 의혹도 제기하는군요.

(업계용어가 난무합니다만..)

그런데 결혼에 대해 이렇게까지 심하게 속물적으로 접근해야 하는 것일까요?